Have you ever said this? If you have, I want you to rethink. You probably think you’re a decent person (and you probably are!), but you are being rude by saying this. Huh, you might ask?
I Don’t Need a Microphone, I’ll Speak Up!
Category: Allyship
Trans Folk are not Your Fucking Shock Troops: What can Cis People do?
I see pictures of a protest. It can be about just about anyone’s rights, maybe nothing that directly addresses trans rights, and in the street and there are dozens, hundreds, or even thousands of people. But what draws my attention isn’t the crowd size. It is who is at the front: more often than not, trans folk will be among the vanguard of the protest. These trans folk know how trans folks are treated by police and the criminal justice system. Yet they are the ones in front. It is time for others to step up for us.
(from the Transgender Archive)
Communication Speed Mismatches
Think about what makes something accessible. You probably think of ramps and elevators, and maybe you think of things like sensory needs. What about communication speed? Communication speed can be just as much of a barrier as a set of stairs, particularly for some autistic or neurodivergent folk.
“Yes, it’ll be accessible!”
When you show up, you’ll probably also hear, “why are you angry?”
“These words “It’ll be accessible” doesn’t mean what it says. If you are disabled, and you hear this phrase, what it really means is, “Our assistant manager knows someone with a disability, and they did just fine at our event/store/business/service/etc.” It certainly doesn’t mean it’ll be accessible.
Record Scratches and Dog Whistles
Me: “We need to leave. Now.”
Him: “Huh?”
Me: “Just…let’s go. Really.”
Him: “What?”
Me: <exasperated whisper> “Don’t you see the way I’m being looked at? We need to leave.”
Him: “Nobody is looking at you!”
Me: <annoyed whisper> “Yes they are, and I’m going to leave without you if you don’t come with me.”
I’m a trans woman. He’s a cis man. But I bet many of my readers have been on one side of this conversation–and likely both sides–at some point in their lives, regardless of their gender history. Maybe it wasn’t about gender, but about skin color, the language being spoken, religious dress, disability, class, or else entirely. One person knows something is wrong, the other can’t see it.
It’s related to a film trope–there’s a bar, there’s some music playing, but when the protagonist walks in, the needle scratches and the record stops. You know something bad is about to happen. It is usually a lot more obvious that someone is out of place. It is them versus the bar.
Here’s one of my favorites:
Let’s think about this scene a bit though, at least the opening, as it doesn’t end like it might in real life.
Continue reading “Record Scratches and Dog Whistles”How Can I Support a Trans Person I Know?
Trans people are hurting right now, particularly in the United States.
What can cis people do to support them?
Gendered Thoughts 